Some Enchanted Evening, You May Meet A Toadie . . .

*** continued from previous post ***


With all my heart and soul I hope to see a toad, just so I can put her at ease. Validate her reality, if you know what I mean. But nada. Zip. The big EL Zero on the toad front.

Yet obviously, the girl is sensing something. In a rush of metal activity I ponder many things: Are invisible Canadian Toads poisonous? Is this what the border guard was trying to warn us about? Is the girl insane? On some really, really good drugs?

Or is she the victim of some enchantment. Maybe she and her boyfriend were just sitting there, enjoying the view of the lake and the mountains, when an evil Witch pulled up in an old beat-up Chevy Nova with rust spots and a "Kill the Vegans" bumper sticker, flipped them off (presumably because they looked like they might be Vegans, or know Vegans, or just have a fondness for vegetables), and turned said boyfriend into a swarm of invisible Toads? It happens you know. Random curses like this occur far more frequently than anyone cares to mention. The Gummit just doesn't like to admit it because really, what are you gonnajavascript:void(0) do to protect yourself against something like that?

Maybe the girl is simply mistaken. Maybe later her boyfriend will show up, after a leisurely stroll around the lake and she will beat him within an inch of his life for making her worry. It's the feminine way.

"They're so tiny," the girl says to Mom, and kneels down on the pavement to point at what I think is a piece of gravel, but turns out to be a hopping piece of gravel that motates quite quickly towards the water several feet away. Funny behavior for gravel, I think, but hell - this IS Canada. Stranger things have happened. As evidenced by the girl having her boyfriend turned into an invisible swarm of toads by an evil, vegan-hating witch not more than an hour before our arrival.

Mom kneels down next to the girl and motions me over with a frantic wave of her hand. "Hey! David! Look at this!"


*** the journey continues tomorrow. Unless I get a better offer. ***