Zebra crossing

As I came close to the end of my ass-shattering ride, having stopped only for gas and to slam down protein bars and Red Bull, the sun was just barely above the horizon. I traversed the final dirt road leading into the Bayete zulu game farm in Mkuze with my tinted visor raised. I imagined that as the sun finally set I’d hear drums in the distance and vines would drop down from the trees overhead, snaring me and reeling my up to God only knows what unpleasant fate.

It didn’t happen though, but as I rounded the bend into Bayete’s property I almost ran into a herd of zebra. I kid you not. The beasties scattered, but about 50 metres further along the road was blocked by three unglulates – somewhat moosey they were, with beards and big-ass corkscrew-shaped antlers. I honked my hron and they dispersed, although I probably should have dropped to the ground and played dead or something of the like. What next – lions? Panthers? All these animals – they’re a bloody menace, I tell you.

Running on fumes now (me, not the bike) I pulled up to the stunning Bayete lodge and was greeted by Landie – the dear – who promptly fetched me a beer without me even asking. Check-in was painless and I hightailed it for the shower, which was welcome after the day’s 30 degree heat. Thus refreshed, I summoned my last resources and made it through dinner and three beers before falling comatose into my mosquito net-shrouded bed.